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Merry bloody ChristmasWherever you areWhoever you areYah Christmas is greatThat is if you have money in the bankA roof over your head and 2.1 childrenA dog and a catAnd 2.1 cars preferably 4x4'sCosily parked on the driveKeep up with the JonesesOur turkey has got to be the biggestMost vulgar and horrid thingYou ever saw on a dinner tableFuck the turkey(Ooh I forgot he is already stuffed
)Mother is running around like a headless chicken(I thought we were having turkey???)In and out of the kitchenWhilst father is busy lookingSo very important having a tipple or threeTo steady his handsReady to carve that geneticallyEngineered thing called a TurkeyOh my just look at thoseGreen balls!!!Brussels sproutsReal fart instigators
.All the trimmings such asSausages wrapped in baconThe obligatory cranberry sauceStupid silly hats and crackers filled withTat and desperate jokesAs all sit down to eatMother is knackeredAfter weeks of planning